There are some people who can commit readily and others who have an eternal fear of commitment. I belong to the latter group. The only commitment I did easily was to get married. I really don't know what prompted me to get married to a guy I barely know. But my reasoning was that I had dated a guy for years but was still afraid to get married to him, but when I met the right guy I did not think twice. I think it was meant to be.. and I can find no other explanation.
Even when I decided to have a child, I was doubtful of my maternal feelings. I felt it was an irreversible decision, another life depends on you. It was a really big change. Looking back though I have to say, life has changed tremendously, I cannot imagine not having a child. My daughter though difficult at times, is most certainly the most beautiful thing in the world and we love her to death. I learn a lot from her. I am strict with her at times, only beause I don't want her to be a spoiled child. Now I realize why my parents were so strict and what they must have gone through raising us.
Some day, my child, I hope you understand this and also know that even though I get mad at you, I love you more than anything in this world and my only prayer is that you have a safe, healthy and happy and long life.
No comments:
Post a Comment